Fat food

There is a move afoot in our fair country to make restaurants post the calories contained in their offerings. The powers that be have decided that we need to know that A Burger King meal of a Triple whopper, coke and French fries will give us 2,130 calories and we need to know it before we buy it.

I am guessing that to those folks who snarf down that kind of gut busting chow the calories don’t mean a thing. I mean if you are in line at a fast food restaurant you already are in calorie hell so what difference does it make if you choose a Big Mac (560 calories) or a Whopper with cheese (760 calories)? Either way you are on the way to the E.R. if you eat those on a regular basis. Can you say Myocardial infarction?

Putting those calorie ratings on the menu boards will probably not stop anyone from ordering a heart attack on a bun, any more than the warning on the side of the cancer sticks stops a smoker from sucking down poison. No, if they really wanted to do something useful how about posting pictures of the consequences of eating stupid. McDonalds and Burger King both have menu items with rather reasonable calorie content. The Caesar salad with chicken at both of the food giants’ clock in at 220 calories, a reasonable choice for a meal.

How about beside that item on the menu board instead of posting the calories you show a picture of a happy smiling young healthy couple? Make it a little sexy. Then (and you know what’s coming here don’t you?) next to the really high calorie items on the menu put a picture of a frowning angry fat person. A single angry frowning fat person. The more calories the fatter the person you post.

Don’t stop there.

On the wrapper put a picture of an extra large sized person in skimpy shorts or a tank top with rolls of fat squeezing out. Make them look like they don’t enjoy life.

The message should be, eat this and be like me. Angry and not sexy. Come to think of it maybe you could deter smokers the same way. Instead of that useless warning on the smokes why not a picture of a lung riddled with cancer? Of course then we would have to put pictures of car wrecks on beer bottles.

Truth in advertising? It’ll never happen.


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About James Rising

A recovering radio addict wrestles with the written word.
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