I am not as think as you drunk I am

Burp


I have never really had a run in with the police.

I have had my share of what the troopers call moving violations.

On one memorable occasion I was stopped for speeding on the interstate in town whose name ends in Kill in another state. Even though I was being passed by someone when the trooper turned on his flashing lights. I stopped and when the man with the hat approached I asked in what I thought was a calm voice about it. He replied something like there was only me.

I called the Trooper a bad word followed by the word liar.

I am still not sure why he didn’t arrest me, or at least shoot me.

But I can’t hold a candle to the guy they found walking around Luzerne a while ago. About midnight in the night in question this fellow was walking with what officers said was unsteady balance.

And when they asked him for identification they detected a strong odor of alcohol.

It was at this point he began to growl like a dog and tried biting the officers.

Like I say, I can’t even begin to imagine the thought process involved here. The police are bothering me. I am drunk as a skunk. How about I pretend I am Rin Tin Tin.

The guy in question clocked in at point three percent. The legal limit for driving in Pa is .08. I don’t know what it is for walking or growling. By the way, if you’re curious our man turned fido must have had at least 18 beers to get that high a reading. He is in the jail house on $5000 bail. That’s $277 per beer.

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About James Rising

A recovering radio addict wrestles with the written word.
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