Weekender Column- I am Thankful for…
On this day before Thanksgiving I thought I would come up with a list of things I am thankful for. It didn’t turn out quite like I planned. I wanted it to be all warm and fuzzy. Oh well.
I am thankful:
That I don’t have twin, self-guided, idiot seeking SCUD missiles mounted on my car. I would have laid to waste most of NEPA drivers by now.
I am glad I am not able to destroy with laser beam eyes. See above.
That I don’t have the x-ray vision that I prayed for as a boy. The thought of seeing most people sans clothing is scarier than a night in the Sterling Hotel.
I have limited my contact with the human race. My job is now 100% from home. My trips out in the world are few and brief and timed to give me the minimum interaction. This works out just fine. I find the human race is best enjoyed in very small amounts.
This makes me a curmudgeon. I am more than fine with that.
I am not a Penn State alumnus. I am in fact thankful that I have nothing whatsoever to do with them. I am thinking about removing the sign in front of my property that directs you to the Penn State Lehman campus, as it may be construed as aiding and abetting.
We have managed to recover 80% from Tropical Storm Lee/Hurricane Irene. We still have several trees down (anyone want some Applewood? Free!) but the one leaning against the house is gone, with a staggering amount of effort. Good thing too, as it was a superhighway for squirrels. New roof, some paint and we are pretty much there.
We don’t live in Shickshinny. For many, many reasons.
That my health has improved over the past year. I know I have added years to my stay on the planet-here’s hoping that the years I have gained will be good ones and not the ones crawling around on my hands and knees trying to find my cane so I can locate my hearing aid so I can get my false teeth in.
For all my loved ones, near and far. It is, in the end, what it is all about.
That most of my loved ones are far not near. Family is a lot like Ye Olde Stump blower whiskey. Good, but in small doses. Too much makes you wish you hadn’t done so much. For the whole next day, sometimes. Check back with me on Friday.
