This has been the year of the cold

Actually according to the Chinese calendar this is the year of the Dog but if you ask almost anyone it’s the year of post nasal drip.

It all started last year (the year of the Rooster if that’s what you are still writing on your checks).

I caught the cold for the first time in October. It got me pretty good but it ran its usual course in about a week. The worst part of this cold was a sore throat that was beyond belief. So sore that I was completely unable to swallow.

Not to ruin your late breakfast but I carried a small cup around with me rather than swallow saliva. I know its gross but it hurt so much when I swallowed that I would scream. I actually went to the Doctor and even took the pills he prescribed to get rid of that.

Then I got hit by the cold again a week before Christmas. This one lasted…well I am still feeling its effects now. A long stretch of this supercharged cold involved my voice either going completely away or sounding like a rusty door hinge. Not a real good thing considering what I do for a living.

What I found surprising was that when I came to work sounding like Darth Vader with laryngitis that people were perfectly willing to sit and chat with me. I would answer a phone with a barely audible croak and the person on the other end would proceed like everything was normal. Oh you have a cold? That’s too bad. Now read me the Declaration of independence won’t you? There’s a good boy.

What I have discovered is that everyone in one has had this cold or one very much like it in the past few months. Story after story that sounded just like my own sad tale. I am beginning to wonder if it’s all some sort of plot. Call me paranoid but I can never recall a time when everyone I talk to had the same symptoms.

Remember the end of the “War of the worlds?” The aliens were done in by colds.

I told you a while ago that the aliens are among us. And they have figured out how to rule us.

Did I just hear you cough?

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About James Rising

A recovering radio addict wrestles with the written word.
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