I think every place in Northeastern Pennsylvania needs a mascot.
I read an article the other day about how Hollywood boulevard is being overrun with superheroes and characters from movies. Well, not the real ones, you understand, but guys dressed up in costumes that roam the streets of Hollywood looking for tips.
The idea is someone dressed like, say Garfield or Batman will go up to a tourist. Tourist gets out the camera and the character poses for a snapshot then puts out his hand (or his paw) for a tip. At last count there were just under 100 of these characters roaming the streets of tinsel town. I guess it’s called Hollyweird for a reason.
But it got me to thinking. Why shouldn’t we have mascots for every part of Northeastern Pennsylvania? It could provide jobs for hundreds. Oh I know we already have the grump for the Red Barons (R.I.P. child molesting friend) and Tux for the penguins. Local radio stations have a tookie bird and a giant frog but what about Old Forge? Shouldn’t there be a giant pizza slice walking up and down the street waving pepperonis at passers by to entice them into Brutico’s and Arcaro and Gennel’s?
I didn’t go to Pittston’s tomato festival this year but if they didn’t have a guy in a tomato costume roaming around, why not? Both Scranton and Wilkes Barre now have huge restaurant rows, with all the chains there like Olive Garden, Outback steakhouse and Cracker Barrel. Why not flag down passing motorists with 6 foot tall knifes, forks and spoons. Or walking talking menus?
Public Square in Wikes-Barre is noted for them so why not have guys in pigeon suits waddling around? It would serve two purposes. The pigeons might get scared and leave and it would provide a job of sorts for the bums.
Why stop there? Dress jobless folks up as huge paper forms and have them work the parking lots of the big companies around Montage. Underemployed? Get a giant diploma costume and wander around The U in Scranton or Kings in Wilkes Barre and pose for tips.
You could even have enormous crack pipes and 15 foot tall hookers working the streets of Wilkes-Barre. Or maybe not.
I think the idea has some merit.
