Ah-Choo


Why are people so rude? Why can’t we all just get along and behave like we were taught in kindergarten? Wouldn’t the world be a better place? I guess I am just a dreamer but a world where everyone covers their mouth when they sneeze isn’t too much to ask is it? Now, I am not Howard Hughes and I don’t wear a Kleenex™ wardrobe but I almost retch every time someone explodes in sternutation in front of me and I have to waltz through the wake of their aerosol leavings.

I don’t want your germs, thank you very much.

If I wanted to get that close to you that I was going to share the contents of your mouth and lungs I would of least asked for an introduction, don’t you agree?

I was recently informed of new technology in mouth covering. It seems that the old-fashioned method of covering your mouth with your hand when you sneeze or cough is no longer the accepted method. Who knew?

Well, according to no less an authority than the CDC (The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention) there are two acceptable methods to cover your mouth when you sneeze. First, cover your nose mouth with a tissue when you sneeze and cough and then throw the tissue away.

I don’t know about you but usually by the time I sneeze the chances of me finding a tissue are slim and none and slim left town on the last stage.

The fallback is to cough or sneeze into your upper sleeve, not your hand. The idea being of course that instead of cupping your hand and getting all that yeech on it you spare the next person you shake hands with that sharing and give it all to yourself. Brilliant! One up for a government agency.

But in my personal experience no one does this. So every time you touch a door handle or any surface that someone else touches you are touching someone else’s sneeze leavings.

Charming thought.

But speaking of doors what about the long lost concept of holding doors open for others? I hold the door open for everyone because that’s how I was taught and it is a gesture of respect with me, not acknowledging another’s weakness. Why is it then that when my arms are full so I can’t even see the door that the person in front of me lets it slam shut? I guess in spite of my bulky frame I am invisible.

And I think that right there is the key to both sneezes and door opening. The problem is that to some, all others are invisible. Or at least not important enough to bother with.

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About James Rising

A recovering radio addict wrestles with the written word.
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